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Negotiating in good faith

They left the door wide open. I was flabbergasted.

But then again, perhaps they wanted the man to know that his conversation was being overheard by three B'not Yisrael (Daughters of Israel, Jewish women).

They offered to help him get a better parnassah (living, job).

They even dangled an outright bribe in front of him, offering significant financial assistance from our organization for his child--and they were willing to put it in writing.

All he had to do was sign a paper authorizing a Bet Din (Jewish court) to give his estranged wife a get, a Jewish religious divorce. They were ready to call in an eid (witness) and have him sign the paper on the spot.

Sadly, he insisted that he had to consult some other rabbis (in addition to the two rabbis who were doing the persuading).

I've never been prouder to work for this organization.

I pray that this act of kindness results in a kind conclusion.


I am proud of you AND them. My ex husband, a non-Jew - is dragging his feet on a lot of loose ends in our divorce. He kept me pretty much entrapped in the marriage for a long time.

This man is probably controlling. Its too bad that some rabbis will support him. Abuse of any kind is a deal breaker in a marriage. (I do anti-abuse advocacy).

You tell those women they did exactly the right thing. They left the door open so he didn't pull anything. I only hope he didn't take it out on his poor wife or child when he got home.

One can only try to be kind. Unfortunately there are a lot of people in this world willing to project their hate on to kind acts.


By Anonymous Anonymous, at April 26, 2007 7:27 AM  

Since this incident happened at the office, I didn't dare type a response while on the job, where I might have been seen by my boss or co-workers. But now that I'm home, I'm taking the first opportunity to correct a wrong impression and give credit where it's due: The two negotiators were both Orthodox men, and at least one of them is a rabbi. The three B'not Yisrael were us secretaries, seated in the outer offices. As I said, I wonder whether my boss didn't leave the door open on purpose, to ensure not only that we would hear everything, but, more important, that the recalcitrant husband would *know* that we'd heard everything. Sometimes, a little social pressure, not to mention concern about one's reputation, goes a long way. In this case, I certainly hope so.

By Blogger Shira Salamone, at April 26, 2007 8:57 PM  

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